DON’T BE ASHAMED OF YOUR STORY

For some reason hiding behind our secrets seems to be the easy and almost normal thing to do while we are journeying through life.  Don’t be ashamed of your story because you just might inspire or help someone going through the same things.  All people will experience life with circumstances that may or may not be within our control, and what we are learning from these experiences helps to create who we are.  Why do we get so caught up in what people may think that hiding our true self along with our struggles for fear of rejection is more important than sharing who we are and what is happening within our life. Fear takes over our ability to own our life, robs us of our comfort level to share those things that are important, those things that we struggle with, what we may need help with, and sadly cuts off any chance of gaining a support system through difficult times.

In my lifetime, I have hidden my inability to set boundaries and allowed myself to be mistreated in early marital and boyfriend relationships. I have been a closet Christian, suffered alone with anxiety, hid my cervical dystonia condition, and in my competitive fitness hid behind a ripped body as being healthy.  I look back and can see that my fear of rejection kept me from being me.  During the time of my inability to set boundaries, I cared more about what people would think or say than my own health. I never wanted to be considered a failure. I am embarrassed to say that at one point, I did not confess to being a Christian, and just kept it between me and God.  I was so uneasy about having cervical dystonia and the embarrassment of the tremor that can accompany the condition that I did not feel normal and fearful of being the girl that gets pointed at with the whispers behind the back. Having anxiety in my life has sucked and thinking that others would not understand kept me from opening that box as well.

That was years ago, and my journey of accepting myself and sharing who I am really and truly has been such a relief and freeing experience, and has allowed me to help so many suffering the same ways that I have.  I am not saying that it has been an easy road, or something that happens overnight, and I am a firm believer in faith and a positive advocate for a great therapist to assist during difficult times.  Learning to love yourself and share your story is not only a healing process, but also opens the door for others to feel comfortable enough to step toward you for help.  When fear is set aside and being “real” with who we are replaces that chain around our soul, be ready for doors to open and contentment to flood your life. 

So many hide behind relationship problems, eating disorders, medical conditions, drug and alcohol addiction, money problems, and the list can go on, that enjoying what it feels like to truly be happy is impossible.  When we live fake lives with fake smiles, and are so overcome by shame, embarrassment or fear it is no wonder why so many people suffer with depression and stress.  Hiding behind lies does not provide healing and positive growth in our lives and until we learn how to share our stories with courage, we will not be able to be happy healthy people.  We are required to own what and who we are and to become a better person than yesterday.  That will take courage and taking that first step to sharing your story will not only open the window to self-healing but also open the door to inspiring others.   

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Stay Healthy,

Darla

DARLA LEAL, FIT AT 50